Not The Type

I'm not the type to just have dreams or technically remember the dreams that I have. But, lately, I’ve been remembering so many of them. All of which have him. At first, they were the typical cheesy dreams with us holding hands and having sweet conversations. When I woke up from them, I’d try so hard to go back to sleep just so I can be with him even if it was only in my dreams. In all the chaos, my dreamland became my solace. Then things started to get weird. I started to worry. Before I knew it, my dreams turned into nightmares. They didn’t have the long walks together or the sound of our laughter anymore. My dreamland was no longer my solace but rather my fear. I would dream that we no longer exist as two people who held on to and for each other but as two people who gave up – that it was just him and me living our own separate lives without each other to lean on. That WE didn’t exist anymore. Ever since then, I’d wake up scared that those nightmares would turn out to be true. People say that dreams have meanings… but what about nightmares?